cracklin to what's happening right now

New Google Tool Yields Interesting Results

2008-08-06T17:46:00.003-04:00

Using Google's new tool, Google Insight, you can zero in on a population's interest in a particular subject.

Smoke without Worry

2008-04-13T18:12:00.026-04:00

Advances in Nanotechnology Lead to Healthy Cigarette

Nanotechnology has paved the way for a healthy cigarette -- one whose filter can absorb every impurity and release small doses of oxygen to the smoker, which doctors say will keep the smoker alive on average 5-10 years longer than a non-smoker.
This technology reportedly cost Big Tobacco $1-$2-billion dollars to develop and was years in the making. It is code-named "Last Laugh." It is expected to reap big rewards for Big Tobacco, which saw its fortunes decline dramatically when it was sued by several states in the '90s for malfeasance.
Essentially, the space-age filter is made of micro fibers, which can convert--or invert--toxins into pure oxygen. This has even health nuts taking notice.
"It will allow former smokers to return to their first love, smoking. It will allow lifelong non-smokers to finally puff up. It will allow us to market to grade-schoolers now," said Chief Technological Officer, Bill Wade.
"Really, the only thing about smoking that will stay the same is the smell," Wade said. "We found smokers are very nostalgic about the smell, so we didn't mess with it."
Wade said the smell of cigarettes will now be associated with "health" and "longevity," instead of the more negative associations of the past.

Event

2008-03-06T17:01:00.000-05:00

New Addiction

2008-03-04T16:07:00.011-05:00

My posts may be spotty for the next couple of weeks because of a new addiction called Team Fortress 2.
I rate this "ESE": Extremely satisfying escapism.

SL/at "Hippie Pay Island"

2008-02-26T20:10:00.018-05:00

Hadda Doobie: i walked past 72 of you here and not a single one of you is wearing a shred of tie dye

Morgantown Voom: hadda im not a hippie

Hadda Doobie shouts: you should all be arrested

Morgantown Voom: lol

Morgantown Voom: if it makes u feel better

Morgantown Voom: I dont got no shoes on

Hadda Doobie: how is your hair?

Hadda Doobie: nice and neat?

Morgantown Voom: bald lol

Hadda Doobie: ok lol

Hadda Doobie: you are excused

Morgantown Voom: hahahha

[a guy wearing tight white shorts walked by]

Hadda Doobie: i can't believe some of you are wearing preppy tennis outfits here

Morgantown Voom: hahahaha

Doba Despres shouts: i may not wear tye dye but i'll be dayam'd if i'm ever gonna wear anything preppy!

[Then he saw him]
Hadda Doobie: dude, that crocodile on your shirt

Cat Tomorrow shouts: Hadda: who made you the hippie fashion police anyway?
Hadda Doobie shouts: is that an IZOD??

SL/Ol' McDonald's

2008-02-25T22:27:00.046-05:00

My first chance to talk to a Serbian in roughly two weeks...

I remember Milo telling me there was a McDonald's in Serbia (which has since burned down due to rioting). I wanted to ask about the McDonald's as soon as I could.

Patric Styrian: How is Serbia?
Konza Roundabout*: like always...bad
Patric Styrian: are you there right now?
Konza Roundabout: yes, im in Belgrade
Patric Styrian: is the mcDonalds back up yet?
Konza Roundabout: hahahahahaha
Konza Roundabout: i hate them
Konza Roundabout: i mean not McD
Konza Roundabout: hypoctrites
Konza Roundabout: they're destroying and tomorrow will eat big mac
Patric Styrian: true
Konza Roundabout: they didn't destroy pizza hut
Patric Styrian: i wonder why not
Konza Roundabout: i dont know
Konza Roundabout: stupid Serbs didnt know that hut is also american
Patric Styrian: poor things
Konza Roundabout: yea it's kinda..i feel sorry coz of ppl
Patric Styrian: as an American, i can't show my face there right now
Konza Roundabout: lol
Patric Styrian: i dodged milo earlier today
Konza Roundabout: we will say that you r from Kosovo
Konza Roundabout: :)
Patric Styrian: i like spelling Kosovo
Konza Roundabout: ahhh
Konza Roundabout: why must it be so complicated here
Patric Styrian: according to milo, serbia is surrounded by countries it dislikes and distrusts
Konza Roundabout: not really
Konza Roundabout: dont trust milo
Konza Roundabout: he's radical
Patric Styrian: milo and i share a house, and i remember coming home and seeing portrait of slobodan milosevic on wall
Konza Roundabout: pih
Konza Roundabout: i was in prison 1998
Konza Roundabout: political dissident
Patric Styrian: did they treat you well?
Konza Roundabout: what u think?
Patric Styrian: well, we have some prisons over here that are considered white collar
Konza Roundabout: ppl in america don't go to prison because of their political opinions
Patric Styrian: well, some do for not paying taxes
Konza Roundabout: hahaha
Konza Roundabout: yea
Konza Roundabout: you can even find hundreds of pages about our situation on net
Patric Styrian: one day and night, i'm going to do nothing but read about serbia
Patric Styrian: better yet, i think i'll give serbia an entire weekend
Konza Roundabout: ahh you dont have enough time for it in your life
Patric Styrian: i want serbia monday-tuesday, albania tuesday-wednesday, Bosnia wed-th...
Patric Styrian: i never will have time for america
Konza Roundabout: well you will finish albania in one week
Patric Styrian: lol
Konza Roundabout: Serbia is toooo old
Patric Styrian: Serbia is very young in our eyes
Patric Styrian: they haven't caught up to our technology yet, so they are young
Konza Roundabout: ahhh
Konza Roundabout: we don't have many kids
Patric Styrian: no?
Konza Roundabout: nope
Konza Roundabout: we r duying
Patric Styrian: awwww
Patric Styrian: i hope serbia can hang in there
Konza Roundabout: i dont know...first time since shit started i cant handle it anymore
Patric Styrian: conflict gets old
Patric Styrian: boring
Patric Styrian: predictable
Konza Roundabout: i want to come to usa
Patric Styrian: i want to go to holland
Patric Styrian: holland is full of nice people on here
Konza Roundabout: my best friend is living in amsterdam
Konza Roundabout: they all get high
Patric Styrian: mmm
Patric Styrian: country seems to run itself
Patric Styrian: everyone can get high there and country gets away with it
Konza Roundabout: And you can buy weed when you r not sick
Konza Roundabout: ;)
Patric Styrian: they allow weed there for when you're perfectly "well"
Patric Styrian: and it makes you "weller"
Konza Roundabout: yapo

*a pseudonym

Graphic

2008-02-25T06:31:00.014-05:00

This graph seems to prove that news outlets prefer covering "money" more than "love" or "sex"; whereas, people doing searches overwhelmingly pick "sex" over "money." Love comes somewhere in between.

SL/Before my screen went black

2008-02-24T18:53:00.018-05:00

SL/At nude beach

2008-02-23T21:24:00.010-05:00

Zooming in to see if those are tattoos or clothes.

Virtual Reality IS Reality, says famed Inventor

2008-02-22T23:32:00.025-05:00

In a recent interview and speech, inventor/futurologist Ray Kurzweil said the following will happen:

* Ordinary machines will achieve human-like intelligence in the next 20 years.

* We will have the option of having tiny robots transplanted into our brains, which will increase intelligence.

* Every part of our body will have an artificial counterpart enabling us to live longer.

* Virtual reality will compete with "ordinary reality" as a viable alternative.

These advances will come from a mind-boggling "billion-fold increase in the price-performance of computers in the next 25 years," he said, combined with computers getting vastly smaller. How small? "100,000 fold smaller" (according to the BBC), which "would lead to blood cell-size devices... that can go inside our bodies and keep us healthy and inside our brain and expand our intelligence."

These "blood cell computers" would be able to "produce full immersion virtual reality from inside the nervous system," he said.

"Virtual will compete with reality," Kurzweil was quoted telling the Game Developers Conference.

Here is a neat summary of what Kurzweil said about virtual reality:

"In virtual worlds we do real romance, real learning, real business. Virtual reality is real reality.

"Games are the cutting edge of what is happening - we are going to spend more of our time in virtual reality environments.

"Fully emergent games is really where we want to go. We will do most of our learning through these massively parallel interactions.

"Play is how we principally learn and principally create."

After posting this, I saw these headlines--all quite randomly.

SL/Great Names/Bertrand Russell

2008-02-21T21:45:00.001-05:00

SL/Event

2008-02-21T20:53:00.002-05:00

SL/Headless/@ Mystic Academy

2008-02-21T17:01:00.015-05:00

"Hadda, have you really lost your head or is it my viewer?"

"Try waving your hand over my neck."

"?"

"Try clicking on my face. You will find out."

Jane Atkey: yeah - nothing there

Hadda Doobie: happened about a week ago

Hadda Doobie: severe lag storm
Jane Atkey: how terrible!
Hadda Doobie: the first thing i did was check for a penis
Hadda Doobie: i could breathe easier after that
Jane Atkey: Did you have one before? A lot of avatars don't.
Hadda Doobie: of course
Hadda Doobie: first thing i did inworld
Hadda Doobie: maybe it's karma

[It was a very spiritual place]

Vojvodina Amiot: temple?
Hadda Doobie: i had two temples
Jane Atkey: So what brings you to Mystic, Hadda?
Hadda Doobie: i was never very spiritual with my head
Hadda Doobie: now that i've lost it, i'm way more spiritual

Castle then Kicked off Alien Ship

2008-02-20T20:24:00.003-05:00

Yeehaw

2008-02-17T21:59:00.005-05:00

Dance

2008-02-17T21:23:00.004-05:00

SL/Nice Breakdown

2008-02-17T12:30:00.004-05:00

SL/Reuniting with LaeMi/It's been a Very Quick Year

2008-02-14T19:55:00.032-05:00

It's been one year since I met Yetrates at LaeMi's swamp.
LaeMi lives in a mountain near the swamp. She gave us a slide show of what she's been up to these past few months.

Here she is with a purple face, which she said was from a Linux-based glitch that lasted about a week. I said I thought she was holding her breath.

This is from LaeMi's first day in Second Life. LaeMi is such a quick learner, I bet the fire behind her was built by her. She said it belonged to someone else. I asked her if she remembered how to get there. She said she did. I told her I wanted to see if that fire was still burning.

LaeMi said she was wearing original "Linden Hair" in the pic. I asked her where the hair was today. She said it was in her folder. "Nostalgists never delete their original Linden stuff," I joked. LaeMi said she hung out at that place because she was new, on a slow DSL line and it was quiet. I heard the Lindens are going to add insects once lag is no longer an issue, I kidded. So much for the quiet.
She is still wearing that same collar, incidentally. On her first day in Second Life she said she found the collar on the ground and has worn it ever since. Someone's throw-away is her treasure. I said it was the perfect size for her neck.

This is a very cool pic. I call it "Narrowly escaping injury."

It's a very cool pic.

This one is called: "Three women standing around a campfire roasting wieners." (You can enlarge the pic to see it.)

LaeMi said it was done to send a warning to a bunch of griefers who were using certain body parts against them.

At this point Yetrates said she had to go to bed, since it just turned Friday her time (The Netherlands). I said it wasn't necessary for me to go to bed yet, since it was just 6pm Thursday where I was (in Florida). LaeMi said it was 9:00am Friday where she was (in Australia) so she didn't have to go to bed either. We both felt sorry for Yetrates.

SL/Welcome Area War

2008-02-11T21:47:00.000-05:00

All was calm at the Welcome Area except for the usual arguments.

Then the UFOs came. And they kept coming. Just when it couldn't get any worse, Richard Simmons was added to the mix.
This pic from eyewitness SpaceMan Wormser shows the UFOs at an earlier stage, pre Richard Simmons.

After Richard Simmons, came a third, more bizarre wave, showing off a grinning Tom Cruise (sorry, no pics).

Someone screamed "Who is responsible for this??!!!"

I didn't know, but I yelled: "Try using the Focus key on Tom's face, then following it around, and see where it goes. Maybe it will lead you to Xenu!"

SL/more Smoke

2008-02-10T18:01:00.000-05:00

I kept spinning in circles until it formed a ring of smoke around JT.
"Ewww," said JT. "Contact high."
He didn't believe in smoke.
"C'mon," I said. "Do your long hair proud. Take a huff."
He said he was waiting for Iron Maiden to get back together.
"That's the sole reason for your long hair?" I asked him.
"Yes."
I heard a rumor that the drummer of Iron Maiden was found in Second Life quite by accident by another band mate, and they are planning to reunite, but only in Second Life.
"I heard that too," he said.
I am not too familiar with Iron Maiden, I must admit.

Patric: What is your favorite song by iron maiden?

Jeremy Fitzgerald: run to the hills

Patric: you have to put quotes around it, as i'm unfamiliar with their material

johnthomas Jun: power slave and die with your boots on

Patric: are you talking to me?

Jeremy Fitzgerald: lol

SL/Plans

2008-02-10T17:26:00.001-05:00

I want to create a "Chessboard Queen" avatar and say this about her:
"She was Queen of the chessboard--moving like a knight. She was superhuman."

I also want to create a mouth made of cotton for an upcoming stoner art exhibit.

Germans occupy the beach until roughly 2pm SLT, when the Americans take over

2008-02-10T14:25:00.001-05:00

A German woman had some cross words for the fat American when their times overlapped. But it ended peacefully.

SL/Lunar @ Clothing Optional Beach

2008-02-10T11:44:00.000-05:00

The sun was more intense with WindLight installed.
"My doctor says no more than 2 hours in Second Life at a time."
Lots of people were at the beach. There were all kinds of tattoos, including some exotic ones.
"My take-out carton has that exact same character!"
Nude people were everywhere.
"I may not have the biggest penis here, but I guarantee I have the biggest butt."
He tried hitting on one woman. Finally she went (Away). He kept pursuing her until she went (go Away).
Everyone was in shape, except him. "My body is the equivalent of two or three people," he conceded. "Needless to say, I am being pressured for a premium account."
There were the usual warning signs all over the place: "Warning: Don't Forget To Put Clothes On Before Teleporting."

SL/Discussion

2008-02-09T19:44:00.000-05:00

Bringiton: rl i am rejected by people...sl i am accepted
Marra: sl is easier for the most part
Hadda: i am accepted by furries in rl, rejected by them here
Sudie: hahahaah
--

Sudie: I'm curious what people might be thinking about when they make their avis...
Hadda: i started out with lots of tattoos, and finally whittled it down to none
Bringiton: lol
--

Hadda: i didn't have a foot fetish, but i developed one thanks to second life
Marra: What do you mean a foot fetish?
Hadda: well, feet are so well crafted
Hadda: it's mind boggling
Marra: oh do u crave them in rl?
Hadda: i can't stand them in rl, but i study them in sl
Dizzy: lol

SL/Experimenting with smoke

2008-02-09T18:43:00.003-05:00

If you smoke a joint in Second Life the smoke will follow you around. It won't last very long, but you can definitely tell where you've been.
It also applies to vehicles and animals. Riding in a bus I saw my smoke contrails as we sped down the road. I ran up and down the aisle, trying to affect the physics, but the smoke behaved as it should: It drifted up or down, depending on which direction I ran, and which direction the bus was heading (but it especially favored going up).
Riding an elephant provided similar results.
I wondered if this applied to sudden movements too, like sitting in a chair located about 20 meters away. My experiments showed a trace amount of smoke remained after a sudden movement like sitting in a far chair.
I wondered it if it applied to teleporting short distances too.
I got no trace of pot smoke after teleporting from point A to B. No matter how short the distance, the same results. That sucks, knowing you can't appreciate a good smoke in the quantum state.

SL/

2008-02-09T17:37:00.000-05:00

Overheard/Ethiquestion

"If you crash, but your body is still here, do we have the right to mess with it?"

Second Life Spawns New Word

A petition was made to the Oxford Dictionary for the addition of a word found in nite clubs all over Second Life: "Byeall"

SL/Headless/The Presence of Bots in the Neighborhood

2008-02-07T12:40:00.000-05:00

He had to rely on the kindness of strangers since it was a very popular camping bench and he didn't have a head.

Hadda Doobie: someone help me to my seat

ZenWarrior Fuosing: help?! thanks for the laugh! lol

Sinrod Skinstad: what seat?

[the bench was full]

Hadda Doobie: someone needs to figure out how to stretch that bench out another 2-3 feet and they'll be rich

Sinrod Skinstad: lol

[one guy claimed that bots were taking up precious room on benches]

ZenWarrior Fuosing: at least one bot was using an invisible shield which covered half the bench, that's why it wasn't working when I clicked it

Hadda Doobie: is that why i sat on him?

Hadda Doobie: i met a bot on here who said he was halfway to becoming human

Sinrod Skinstad: good for him

Hadda Doobie: he said he was going to become more "human" than we are

Sinrod Skinstad: lol

Hadda Doobie: is that possible?

SL/Double-takes

2008-02-03T06:04:00.000-05:00

Items for sale in Second Life can range from the ridiculous to the sublime. Some blur these distinctions.

Bonus: Here's a description of an actual place.

SL/Headless/Crashing Formal, then crashing

2008-02-02T06:18:00.000-05:00

It was a formal event. He didn't have a head, so he arrived with his fly open. The men looked resplendent in their suits and ties. He didn't have a suit because he couldn't wear a tie. The man on the stairs was security, and was trying to prevent him from entering, but he was a very slow typer, so brushing past him wasn't a problem.
Halfway up the steps the sim crashed, so the guests' reactions couldn't be recorded.

Real Resume

2008-01-31T20:56:00.000-05:00

The owner of a local company sent this along. This is an actual resume he received the other day.
(Highlights are his.)

SL/Great Ideas with Clubs

2008-01-31T19:33:00.000-05:00

Wrath Paine had the idea of having alts with the last name "Morrisey" (in honor of the singer) show up at various clubs in Second Life in Flash Mob Style. Basically, a call would go out about an event (via IM), and all these Morriseys would suddenly show up.

It was all the more intriguing since Morrisey is an "alternative" singer and these are alts.

Meanwhile...

Conifer had the idea of starting a group in Second Life to explore forgotten or deserted dance clubs. As she points out, they're everywhere in Second Life, so we might as well take advantage of them. She's organizing revelers to visit these (sometimes elaborate) structures to party in. She's not interested in tacky, poorly designed clubs--she's interested in "beautiful, or at least imaginative clubs, from glittery rave halls to steamy industrial stomping pits."

As a bonus, she says these events will be lag free.

SL/Headless/Still looking for a head

2008-01-31T17:52:00.001-05:00

He was in a nite club scoping out a future head.
There was only one way to do his homework...
By taking lots of photos.

SL/Love

2008-01-31T17:06:00.000-05:00

Reventon Piaggio shouts: I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY!!!!! I LOVE MELMEL BAGLEY
BigCash Hotshot shouts: Reventon STOP THAT PLEASE
Devilish Gears shouts: okay, we get it!!! geez
Adora Galthie: ffs
Hadda Doobie: true love is when it shoves other peoples' sentences off screen

SL/Mature PG

2008-01-31T16:37:00.000-05:00

Hadda Doobie: no nudity here
Hadda Doobie: no naked pixels here
Adora Galthie: lol
Hadda Doobie: I got around the PG limitation by secretly wearing pubic hair on my face, and no one was the wiser
Adora Galthie: Tsk
Hadda Doobie: sorry, stoned

SL/Meet Hadda Doobie

2008-01-29T22:51:00.000-05:00

...He's headless

////

Kanako Yokosuka: how can i change my appearance?
Hadda Doobie: you aren't allowed to change your appearance for at least one week after arriving inworld
Hadda Doobie: i know, i was born with a beard
Droog Voom: lololol
[Someone pointed out Hadda's lack of a head.]
Hadda Doobie: i had a head when i first came inworld
Hadda Doobie: but we had such a severe lag storm recently I'm grateful this much survived
Atom Cryotank: have you explored much?
Hadda Doobie: i started to explore when the lag hit and they took me to a hospital
Dooble Voom: not a UFO? you had no missing time??
Hadda Doobie: missing limb
Droog Voom: ahhhh much better
Hadda Doobie: i don't miss my head
Droog Voom: dats the trick
Hadda Doobie: i still have a penis
Droog Voom: ahhhh

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area pt. 39/no advertising

2008-01-28T22:44:00.001-05:00

A gentleman was wearing a title above his head which indicated he wanted to be messaged about a new club he was managing, called "The Shop." "They are recruiting early," Soy noted.

To get his attention, Soy said "I was going to IM a woman about a new nude disco she was opening today." That got everyone's attention, including the manager's. Soy continued, "No one is allowed in her club unless completely nude." Nobody batted an eyelash at this information. Soy concluded, "It's the only form of discrimination that's still allowed."

Finally, one woman said something; she said she was dialing her lawyer.

"What for?" inquired Soy.

"Habit," she insisted.

"Call me instead."

"What's your Second Life number?"

"F2 F3 F4 - F9 F1 F9 F8"

SL/the ol' seated on the sofa prank

2008-01-27T19:52:00.001-05:00

The discussion was about twittering and blogging.
Someone asked for the defintion of "twitter," and I said "neverending nervous typing."
/
There was limited seating. The host apologized for the lack of seating, and I apologized for taking up so much room on the couch.
I got up from the lying position and used a fake "sit" animation from my inventory. It looked like I was "sitting," but I really wasn't. I positioned myself on the end of the couch. /
Now where's my first victim?
Here she is.

SL/Party Bus

2008-01-25T22:56:00.000-05:00

Yetrates got a party bus. It had all kinds of funky graffiti on it. Plus, when the sun went down, the headlights came on automatically. It was a trip.

Speaking of tripping, we drove around the entire sim--the roads were nice and wide. At one point we decided to pick up random people. Why not? It was a party bus, after all. Since it was dark out, and we couldn't see anything, we had to use the mini-map. Green dots on the map represented people.
We stopped next to what we thought was a green dot.
"I don't see anything," said Yet after a bit.
"Neither do I," I said. "Drive on."
So she drove on.
"Wait," I said, after a bump. "That was a furry."
"Ok. I'll go back."
"Too late," I said. "Keep driving."

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area, pt. 38/PG

2008-01-24T21:40:00.000-05:00

Soy Burger: you will only see male nipples here

Soy Burger: you will have to wait for a "mature" sim to see female nipples

---

Chips Cupola: Do you like big feet?

Maud Wingtips: just fine =)

Malaria Donat: why not

Soy Burger: i made my feet especially big in Welcome Area since i knew it was a PG sim

Johnny Spicola: i am on a mission

Johnny Spicola: to find a penis

Malaria Donat: ;)

Soy Burger: on "day 3" of every male newbie, a search for a penis is underway

Maud Wingtips: lolololol

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area, pt. 37/blackmail

2008-01-24T21:19:00.001-05:00

He was "Editing his Appearance" and accidentally adjusted it so he had zero muscles, when she took a pic.

SL/New Neighbors

2008-01-21T23:31:00.000-05:00

A mysterious body of water caught my attention as I was flying near home. Investigating further, it looks like a new development.
I have no words to describe.

SL/Event

2008-01-18T22:44:00.000-05:00

SL/Overheard

2008-01-16T22:50:00.001-05:00

Destiny

"One day Second Life will get its servers straightened out and there will be no more lag and birds will be everywhere, random birds, flying here and there. As well as insects. Having no more lag will invite more possibilities, such as insects and birds. And it will get tweaked even more so that birds can leave messes and insects can smash into windshields. Yes, windshields. Windshields will be a lot more common once more and more cars are on the roads. Roads will perhaps give way to freeways. Freeways that support unlimited cars..."

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area, pt. 36/Tales around the Campfire

2008-01-16T21:49:00.000-05:00

Michael interrupted the campfire in his quest for sex

Michael1 Aeon: maybe i can buy a vagina in this game?
Plex Olivier: maybe you should buy a penis first
Michael1 Aeon: i have a very large penis
Scamper Nitely [a dog]: I'll sell you one
Plex Olivier: oooooh
Soy Burger: go ahead and sell him a canine penis
Soy Burger: they are not very big but noticeable
Anita Alcott: gross
Someone was taking snapshots...
Plex Olivier: who is photoing?
Soy Burger: a ghost
Scamper Nitely: not me
Soy Burger: we got photo ghosts
Soy Burger: around campfire

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area pt. 35/Sightings

2008-01-16T21:23:00.000-05:00

Soy: a winged creature came to my campfire
Soy: i love it when winged creatures come to my campfire
Soy: By the way, there was a UFO here last night, and when I went to take snapshots of it I discovered my harddrive was full.
Sianne: lol
Sianne: Was it a green alien?
Sianne: or one of them grey ones?
Soy: couldn't see thru the tiny windows
Sianne: it didn't land?
Sianne: you shoulda shot it down!
Sianne: you coulda made the news!
Soy: yeah i was too afraid
Soy: didn't want it to be Santa
Soy: i remember reading a few stories about that last year
Soy: Santa getting shot down here and there
Sianne: really who would shot Santa down?
Soy: it may have been a former reindeer
Sianne: a reindeer?
Soy: Santa is known to use a whip
Soy: there are lots of santa decoys, tho
Soy: i don't think he was hit
Sianne: That is good I don't wanna miss out on pressies next year
Soy: yeah, all you need is santa and china to stay alive
Sianne: lol
pixiedust: Hi Sianne
Sianne: How are you?
pixiedust: just looking around, what trouble are you up too
pixiedust: be careful people in here are troublemakers
pixiedust: soy is friends with all of them
Sianne: Nothing much just chatting to soy here about the ufo he saw!
pixiedust: Don't believe him
pixiedust: it is a side effect of the marijuanna
Sianne: He didn't shoot it cause he thought it might be santa
Soy: i think the UFO was here because he needs to get from one place to another and hasn't discovered teleporting yet

SL/Evolution?

2008-01-13T21:00:00.000-05:00

Milo had a new friend over to the pool. Except his friend only spoke Serbian, or so I thought.
That is, until I told him that he left his tail behind in pool.
"Fuck the tail" he said.
I was suprised; he did speak some English.
"I don't need it."
"You are going to be a furry without a tail?" Furries with no tails, or tails cut short, are frowned upon by other furries. Did he know that?
"Who cares?"
"?"

"mentol tail"
"menthol tail?"
"mentol tail"
"Ahhh, you mean mental tail. In other words, your mind still thinks you have a tail?"

Fascinating

2008-01-13T20:58:00.000-05:00

The 100 oldest registered domain names. Click here to see the rest.

SL/Something happened (damned if I know what)

2008-01-10T21:38:00.000-05:00

Here I am full throttle with my new outfit, an ape.
I hung out at the nite clubs, and danced, as usual, but something was bothering me--something I couldn't put my finger on. Then I recalled what happened! It happened at my other property this morning, the property next to the swamp...the property I seldom visit. A long time ago for some reason I built a black monolith there and abandoned it. I honestly forgot all about it. Then this morning I went there inexplicably. I'm not sure what happened after that, but I do remember seeing the monolith. Since then I've had a nagging feeling that I shouldn't be hanging out at the clubs anymore. I will let you know what happens.

SL/Meet Lunar Blinker

2008-01-07T06:18:00.000-05:00

He enjoyed hanging out temporarily clothed at the nude beach.
"I don't have a buff body but I understand I can get naked here?"
A stud named Trey didn't think so.
"Jesus man! You wide! Get lost."
Then a babe chimed in:
"The SL gods gave you free will, Lunar, so do as you please, but do it out of my eyesight."
"You mean I should walk off your screen right now?"
"Yes, if you are naked."
"What if I have the most fascinating tattoo in the world on my butt...would u look?"
"No."
"What if this tattoo had something to do with your heritage?"
"I still wouldn't look."
Lunar was not getting anywhere. "I cannot stand being around all these buff bodies," he announced. "I'm going to bury myself in sand." Then he thought of a better plan. "I'm going to rejoin the ocean." He waddled out to the sea.
"Damn that is a big butt," he heard someone crack.
He waded into the water. "No sharks here," he muttered. "No lightning either. Yet there is a definite threat of me re-emerging naked on beach."

His tormentor Trey showed up in water.
Lunar got defensive.
"Watch out! I can make bigger waves than u"
"LoL. Come back to the mainland, Lunar."
"Why?" Lunar was confused.
"We miss picking on you."
"Oh, all right." Lunar followed him back to the mainland.
"Lunar said he could make bigger waves than me," Trey laughed, informing his buff posse of the exchange. "I said I didn't want to risk a tsunami."
"Ahahahahahaahahahaha."
Lunar blushed. He noticed his blush extended down his upper cheeks to his stubby neck then disappeared under his undershirt. Maybe to his cheeks below...
"What are you daydreaming about?" someone asked Lunar.
"Nothing...I learned to fly today."
"You mean you learned how to blot out the sun?"
Ahahahahhahaahahahaha. Meanwhile, Lunar saw that Trey had two nice-looking women mother-henning him.
Nardya Rousselot: I think we start with the shape

Alyssa Salmson: then skin

Nardya Rousselot: hair, eyes, new clothes, and on

Trey Honi: what shape do i want?

Nardya Rousselot: don't worry, Trey, we will show you what you need

Trey Honi: kk, lets go :)

Lunar couldn't relate.

"Women don't bother taking me shopping anymore," he said. "They figure my body is beyond hope."

Nardya Rousselot: lol

Lunar Blinker: i told them I looked good at Orientation Island, tho

SL/Quick ride

2007-12-26T20:54:00.000-05:00

I got a tandem bicycle and Yetrates hopped on for a quick ride around the sim.

Here we are stuck under the boardwalk.

We came to an oddly familiar-looking place. I used my Zoom key to peek inside the building.

Sure enough, it was the gay estate down the road.

I hadn't been 'banned' from the estate yet, but I wanted to be, especially since I kept running into it. A ban would keep me off the property for good.

"Uh oh," I said to Yet after I looked at its official description. "It says 'GAY MEN ONLY/NO LADIES HERE.' We've got to get you moving."

Try as I might, I couldn't find a way out. We kept going in circles. "Christ," I said. "I think we're stuck in a gay paradise."
"Try this way out," she suggested. "No, that way." Yet was offering various ways out. "Go 180-degrees."

Never, I thought.

"Go STRAIGHT," she finally yelled, but she spelled it like George "Strait."

"That'll be enough of that word," I said--not wanting to offend.

Another roadblock.

"Cut your hair," I demanded.

"What??"

"It's either cut your hair or build a miniature house over your head. You can't be spotted the way you are."

She cut (and dyed) her hair.

Another road block.
"You still got way too many curves," I reminded her, "so you might as well grow your hair back." So she did.

We drove around the roadblock...

Freedom! /

But wait!
/

"Omg is that a coliseum?" I asked.
"Yeah," she answered.
"Greek or Roman? I'm still nervous."

Christmas Day/Night

2007-12-26T06:42:00.000-05:00

If you look closely, in this empty diner, you can see me sitting by myself.
I wasn't sure if I could seat myself, though, since there was no waitress around.
I'd stumbled across the diner in the lovely Doll City sim.
It had been a hectic Christmas...
Earlier, I helped JT and Ulises out by letting them stay at my house. Except I didn't have room. But then I had an idea: I would stack another house on top of mine. Now there was plenty of room!
/
/
/
/
/
/

Before that, we all were at Pappy's place, and Pappy waited until we were loaded up in his truck to inform us that he himself had been 'loading up' all day! Thank god his truck didn't have a transmission, or we would have ended up in the ocean.
This is me--as a monkey--in Pappy's outhouse. I wanted to be a monkey today, and the outhouse is one of the first places I wanted to see. As a monkey, it took me twice as long to get out.
Present tense: Now I'm at Elle's club, watching her stack presents under the Christmas trees. (I've since left the diner.) I don't know for sure, but I suspect this arrangement is for the Serbians, who celebrate it next month on the 7th. There's a heck of a lot of work and planning that goes into a club, including keeping track of how many Christmases there are.

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area pt. 34/Christmas Eve

2007-12-24T17:38:00.000-05:00

It was 6:45pm where Soy was (compared to the rest of the world)

littlebigmanlbm Back: Happy Christmas everyone
Foxnsane Ceawlin: Merry Christmas to you too ^^
Seren Qinan: is it Christmas for you, yet?
Beryl Hawker: no
Margaut Lane: for me, yes
littlebigmanlbm Back: Super Love amongst nations
Seren Qinan: Happy Christmas :)
Yoko Zemlja: I'm from Denmark
Create Ninetails: oh cool
Foxnsane Ceawlin: yeah, it's christmas day already :)
Helex Quinnell: 25th now
Foxnsane Ceawlin: 1:44 AM
Helex Quinnell: 7:45am
Soy Burger: Helex, are u serious?...you're in the prime of Christmas right now...that means the presents have been opened
Helex Quinnell: yes I am serious
Soy Burger: where you at? australia?
Helex Quinnell: no
Helex Quinnell: Hong Kong
Soy Burger: wtf
Yoko Zemlja: The gifts has been opened..the Duck has been eaten.....and the children put to bed..
Foxnsane Ceawlin: Duck?
Soy Burger: Duck? Who's the one in hong kong?
Helex Quinnell: I want Turkey!
Helex Quinnell: where re u from Soy
Soy Burger: a little town called Florida
Helex Quinnell: I see
Yoko Zemlja: In Denmark we eat Duck and pork...
Scottish Alcott: hey luffy, and everyone else
Soy Burger: Scotland is here, good...it will be interesting to find out what scotland eats
Scottish Alcott: if yer talking christmas, we have a choice of ham, poultry and steak
Alex Farnsworth: what are you having soy?
Soy Burger: pizza
Soy Burger: i am carving pizza tomorrow
Blau Huet: and toast
Helex Quinnell: I want some table wine too
Soy Burger: stuffed pizza :)
Soy Burger: i preheat the oven to 350
Soy Burger: i do all the same things you do for turkey
Helex Quinnell: what's the sauce with the turkey over there?
Soy Burger: marinara
Scottish Alcott: well its just turned midnight here, merry christmas everyone, hope you all have a great day.
Bert Eales: will do
Soy Burger: a *real* merry christmas to you, scotland
Soy Burger: since you are in actual christmas now

littlebigmanlbm Back: LOL ALL I SAID WAS HAPPY CHRISTMAS
Soy Burger: you said happy christmas, not merry christmas
Soy Burger: it was a dead giveaway
Soy Burger: that you don't celebrate it

Year in Review, My Links

2007-12-23T05:21:00.000-05:00

Here are my "Favorites" or "bookmarked" sites in no particular order. Share them with your friends (or sneer at them and say "HUMBUG," I don't care). These are the sites I collected since my computer went 'kaput' and Internet Explorer was re-installed, so there's not many, but since this is the end of the year, and the end of the year usually means roundups, here they are:

http://thegridlive.com/category/aribella-lafleur/ (Aribella is a friend I met at a Second Life Welcome Area. This is her blog.)

http://home.comcast.net/~labvid/flash/hold/video.htm (This is a web page detailing a lot of the locations for interesting Matrix-style Google videos.)

https://pin.ed.gov/PINWebApp/pingerrdb.jsp (This is where I log-in to see my Student Loan payment status.)

http://www.intp.org/intprofile.html (My INTP profile.)

http://www.pathwaytohappiness.com/ (A very cool "consciousness-related" website that has plenty of free podcasts to download.)

http://www.cncden.com/cnc3maps_spyvspy.shtml (A repository of C&C3 maps.)

http://www.realitysandwich.com/ (Daniel Pinchbeck's website. Pinchbeck is a psychedelic shaman who wrote the classic, Breaking Open the Head. This site has Pinchbeck and a lot of great writers ruminating on day-to-day events.)

http://www.matrixmasters.com/podcasts/ (Another one-stop place when it comes to excellent mind-expanding podcasts. They have everybody: Terence McKenna, Pinchbeck, Rupert Sheldrake... [Use the vertical scrollbar near the top.])

The majority of the Second Life blogs I follow I access, not via my "Favorites," but via the links on this page (or following the links on other people's pages). That's the beauty of the new "Web": a lot of the links you rely on are no longer stored on your computer, but on others' pages. This *springboard* can be considered a new form of 'inter-connectivity' that springs you, like a mosh-pit person, from one set of hands to another.

SL/Smaller body = different perspective

2007-12-23T04:54:00.000-05:00

Here's Yetrates and I right before we decided to walk around the neighborhood. Every time I turned around, though, Yet was at least 20 steps ahead of me. Small things which I used to pay no attention to now gave me trouble, like steps.

/ /

Patric: I can not navigate steps like you, Yet, learn to slow down!

Yetrates: fly then Patsy
/

Here is a clothing store owned by a French neighbor.

Here is my Spanish friend Ulises asleep within the French store.
There were some odd shaped seats here...
Honeycomb

SL/Temporary Avatar

2007-12-20T18:03:00.000-05:00

I decided to be a bee, since there is nothing as incongrous as a bee buzzing around winter-themed sims.

I resisted the urge to be a reindeer, mainly because I remember the abuse one took in a niteclub I was at last year. People were riding it like it was the bar bull. (It was all fun and games until a burly Santa showed up.)

So, I decided to be nothing "Christmassy" this year. Nothing invoking saliva. Nothing to ride on. But something that would invoke fear if I got too close.

SL/Modification

2007-12-20T02:19:00.000-05:00

"I wanted a goatee, but things went horribly wrong and I ended up with a beard."

Soy: if you have tattoos AND muscles AND sunglasses, the chances you will meet women here increase by the minute

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area pt. 33/Where You From?

2007-12-20T01:55:00.000-05:00

(Welcome To: Ahern)

Cravez McCallen: i am in colorado
Anna Parks: dont know if i like USA...been there, too cold.
Soy Burger: we are all in Ahern
Markb66 Balogh: think usa sucks
Cravez McCallen: its an opinion
Kale Kesslinger: yea
Cravez McCallen: i was born in alabama
Soy Burger: my computer is swapping bits of data with you
Soy Burger: no matter where you're from
Jaide Beck: cool.
Anna Parks: that sounds so, revolutionary, soy.
Soy Burger: it feels nice

SL/Overheard in Welcome Area

2007-12-20T01:34:00.000-05:00

"The older you get the more tattoos you will get."

"If you locate people with tattoos you will find them seasoned vets."

SL/Overheard

2007-12-18T22:26:00.000-05:00

"The only places you are allowed unlimited nudity are mature sims (for obvious reasons) and, oddly enough, Orientation Island, where nudity is commonplace. PG-sim nudity, though, is still a no-no. "
--
"It's so convenient not knowing how to shake people's hands since I've been here."
--
"I have a zillion folders in S/L I just realized and none of them contain a single naked picture."

Peace on Earth

2007-12-17T06:07:00.000-05:00

Last Fourth of July, we listened to Ayo, a Serbian, sing (American) songs at our pool. These were love songs, mostly. I asked if she would be available this Christmas to sing patriotic songs. Yes, she said, of course.

I needed claificiation. "Our Christmas--the 25th, not your Christmas, January 7th," I said.

"Yes."

"Great," I said.

I can't wait to hear some Serbian-influenced American nationalist songs on the non-Eastern-Orthodox pagan-Judaic holiday known as Christmas.

It will be better than any gift I can receive.

Wedding w/ Windlight®

2007-12-16T20:37:00.001-05:00

Thank GOD someone was at the wedding reception with enough sense to have Windlight® installed, so we could get some great pics.

Here are some of the pics that Yetrates took.

SL/True Love

2007-12-16T20:07:00.000-05:00

Abfab and Morganis got married tonight. At the reception, I asked Abfab if she would kindly do a zombie dance in her wedding gown. She obliged.

Abfab Hax: Ready Patric??
Patric: yeah
Patric: that is true love, Morganis just joined you
Patric: as a zombie
Abfab Hax: I know.....LOL

SL/Stuck

2007-12-15T19:46:00.000-05:00

Yetrates got a brand new truck. It was a monster. "Holds six," she said proudly, as I climbed in.

We rumbled to an area near the house.

I was surprised to see wilderness there.

"We off-roading?" I asked.

"yea."

"Wait, there's a pal."

He was floating directly above us and his name was Siberian Himmel.

We hit a tree and came to a sudden stop. It was remarkable because it was the only tree around.

"Hey you, buddy! The guy above us...the guy responsible for this! Hey, look--he's a Serbian."

Yetrates Bates: lol

Siberian Himmel: Stuck?

Patric: hello, Siberian
Patric: do you live around here?

Siberian Himmel: I don't have a home. I'm homeless.

Patric: ok

Patric: you can sleep in our pool if you like

Yetrates Bates: hehe, its warm

Siberian had to leave suddenly. We kept looking in the distance for flashing yellow lights. The tow truck was late. It had been 20 minutes since we called.
Just then, there was a heavy landing, accompanied by a slight "thud."

Patric: hi Cailean

Cailean McMillan: Hey!

...Another stranger had dropped by...

Patric: what brings you here?

Cailean McMillan: i heard the music being played mid flight

Patric: as you fluttered down i was hoping i'd see angel wings

Cailean McMillan: lol

Patric: we're stuck

Cailean McMillan: hah, I'm no angel

Patric: we were off-roading and hit that tree right there

Cailean McMillan: that sucks

Patric: yes, it sucks because it's the only tree in sight

Patric: we've been waiting here for a tow truck for 20 mins
Patric: we thought we saw blinking yellow lights earlier...
Patric: it was a blimp

(Just then, I had an inspiration for a project someone could build. A blimp.)

(Patric: a giant blimp
Patric: with artwork
Patric: on outside
Patric: a Goodyear-like blimp
Patric: instead of advertisements, it could blink artwork)

Cailean McMillan: so is that music coming from your truck?
Yetrates Bates: lol no
Cailean McMillan: am i the only one that hears it?
(He was hearing land music.)
Patric: i hear something too
Patric: i thought it was her singing
Yetrates Bates: haha crzy PAtsy
Cailean McMillan: hah hah
Patric: by her i mean the car
Cailean McMillan: so do you guys live together?
Yetrates Bates: Yea we live in the same house
Patric: we live in different time zones but we share the same house
Cailean McMillan: hah, that's neat
Yetrates Bates: ;)
Cailean McMillan: what time zone is that?
Yetrates Bates: European
Patric: sometimes our time zones overlap
Patric: i caught her in the kitchen one night
Yetrates Bates: haha
Cailean McMillan: heh heh
Yetrates Bates: ....i waz starving
Yetrates Bates: needed that chicken

(She was talking about my former pet chicken.)

Cailean McMillan: lol
Yetrates Bates: the chicken that runs thru his garden
Patric: my chicken is homeless now i think
Patric: i haven't seen him in awhile

Yetrates Bates: you lose all ur pets
Patric: i trust he made it past thanskgiving all right...
Cailean McMillan: it sounds like you guys have alot of fun
Patric: we don't
Yetrates Bates: ;)
Cailean McMillan: hah :0)
Patric: you can come by and sleep in our pool anytime
Yetrates Bates: or in the truck

Chevelle -- I Get It

2007-12-15T19:02:00.001-05:00

The best rock song I've heard in a long time. Simply fantastic. Whatever you do, get your hands on it. Magnificent. superb. Awesome. Rockin. WOW!

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area pt. 32/Don't Jump

2007-12-13T19:46:00.000-05:00

Rainstorm Barthelmess: I got a house
Soy Burger: show me your house right here in Welcome Area

Soy Burger: someone gave me a house the other day and i wore it on my pelvis
Rainstorm Barthelmess: lol
Rainstorm Barthelmess: Well
Rainstorm Barthelmess: I can't do that
Soy Burger: wait...there's someone on roof
/
Soy Burger: dont do it, Pete
Sassenach Galthie: wow
Soy Burger: does anyone have a net?
Soy Burger: how about a ladder?
Rainstorm Barthelmess: aww don't worry, he'll live
Soy Burger: how about a bed?

INTP

2007-12-13T16:23:00.001-05:00

I got hit by a thunderbolt last night. I took the Myers-Briggs personality test and found out that I am an:

INTP

If you want to know what makes me tick, trust me, I am INTP. When I was reading its description my mouth was open, like "Wha..! I can't believe I'm reading this--it's describing me perfectly!"

It was so startling, with its insights into me, that I searched late into the night for more reading on INTPs; in other words, for insights into me.

Behold, there were forums, and other websites, and I spent hours reading others' thoughts that were like echoes of my own. The INTPs think alike.

I invite you to find out your own personality type by taking the test.

May you be surprised by the results.

Time Traveler

2007-12-10T19:39:00.000-05:00

I went in search of a paw print picture and found a pretty good one.

What fascinated me the most was the earnest but generic page it was hosted on. (You can see the page here.) At the bottom of the webpage it said: "Updated: 7 January 1997."

1997! I didn't think pages that old were still around! Too cool! And to think I found it on Google, doing a legitimate search. THANK YOU GOOGLE FOR ALLOWING ME TO TIME TRAVEL! I hadn't been to 1997 in soooooooooo long!

I went back to 1995 last summer, I will admit, also thanks to Google. It was the biggest leap of my life so far. I spent a good 30 minutes there, taking in the sights. Text was helter skelter, just the way I like it, and running off the page. The graphics were on the small side (to save bandwidth!), and it was using the 'default font' of the time, New Times Roman. I smiled. It was good to be back again.

Indeed, the picture above is linked directly to that page from 1997. Every time I see that paw print, I get goosebumps, because I know it is reaching out from the past.

Leonard Maltin

2007-12-09T22:10:00.000-05:00

Who is the best movie reviewer alive today? Why, yes--it's none other than Leonard Maltin, whose movie reviews are succinct and superb. Here's a gem, from his annual Movie Guide, which may be the greatest (brief) movie review of all time:

"The Terror of Tiny Town (1939) 63m. *1/2 (out of 4 stars)
If you're looking for a midget musical Western, look no further. A typical sagebrush plot is enacted (pretty badly) by a cast of little people, and the indelible impression is that of characters sauntering into the saloon under those swinging doors!"

SL/Meditation

2007-12-09T18:40:00.000-05:00

Patric: ohhmmmmm
Patric: ohhhmmmm
Patric: breathe in
Patric: breathe out
Shellsea Bailey: in with the good air, out with the bad.
Patric: let me have a mint first
Shellsea Bailey: lol
Patric: serenity now
Patric: keep the bugs off me
Shellsea Bailey: you are having way too much fun, Pat.
Patric: i need to cut it off
Shellsea Bailey: So Pat, how's it going with the meditation?
Patric: phew, i thought u were going to say medication
Shellsea Bailey: Hah!
Patric: beautiful
Patric: i can almost see my navel
Shellsea Bailey: LOL Now that's a disturbing vision.
Patric: about 18 more puffs i'll be in heaven
Shellsea Bailey: lol You need to come back down. They won't let you in with pink fuzzy shoes.
Patric: even more disturbing, I have more than one navel
Shellsea Bailey: ROFL
Shellsea Bailey: X-files....
Patric: well, i mean i have an extra one in Inventory
Patric: i wanted two on me
Patric: but Lindens won't allow it
Shellsea Bailey: Now doncha wish we could have that inventory in RL?
Shellsea Bailey: lol
Patric: yeah, kinda
Patric: i got wheelbarrels full of junk, tho
Shellsea Bailey: I wouldn't have to use up any closet space either.
Patric: true dat
Patric: just attic
Shellsea Bailey: Oh I know! I spend almost a whole day filing stuff.
Patric: you are used to it then
Shellsea Bailey: Yes.
Shellsea Bailey: But you have been here longer than me.
Patric: yeah, about a year
Patric: for the first month i wandered around naked
Shellsea Bailey: I came here in July
Shellsea Bailey: ROFL you didn't!
Patric: i had a difficult start
Shellsea Bailey: Too funny.
Patric: hell, i didn't even learn to walk until my first week
Patric: i just sat down as soon as i came inworld

Shellsea Bailey: Oh stop that. You got me crackin up.
Patric: i still haven't learned to run
Shellsea Bailey: I didn't know we could do that. lol
Patric: i don't even know if i can swim
Shellsea Bailey: Scuba too
Patric: Scuba is off coast of Sflorida

Shellsea Bailey: You dive?
Patric: i dive when i drop bud

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area pt. 31/Buster

2007-12-09T06:15:00.000-05:00

Soy Burger: my twin Buster everybody

[Buster inexplicably removes his clothes.]
Soy Burger: my nude twin Buster

Buster Falworth: whatsup burger

Soy Burger: now you can see me nude without benefit of having me strip

Imnotgoing Sideways shouts: Ick Buster CLOTHES~!!!!!!!
Vladislav Ariel: how do u edit eyes
Ponce Weaver: i need to edit my eyes after seeing him nude

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area pt. 30/small talk

2007-12-08T22:51:00.000-05:00

Vladislav Ariel: /becomeslaphappy
Soy Burger: omg i got laid last night
Vladislav Ariel: really soy
Vladislav Ariel: what is that like
Vladislav Ariel: it's been so long
Soy Burger: it was very scripted
Vladislav Ariel: oh
Soy Burger: but otherwise all right
Vladislav Ariel: cool

SL/Remember when

2007-12-08T22:46:00.001-05:00

For "Old School" Night, the DJ played an mp3 that had a skip in it. And the skip reminded everyone of the vinyl "good old days."

SL/Self-Censorshi*

2007-12-08T22:27:00.000-05:00

/
/
/
Overheard

Vladislav Ariel: wow..i leave for a sec and come back to some defamation and terrible swear words
Soy Burger: lol
Imnotgoing Sideways: Swear words belong in only one place.
Soy Burger: the more i drink in real life, the more i swear in SL
Soy Burger: if i'm sober i use asterisks in words, like g*ddammit, or mothe* fuc*er, but when i'm drunk i drop everything

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area pt. 29/this grass is nice

2007-12-08T21:55:00.000-05:00

"This grass is nice. When I say that, you won't know if I'm speaking of here or my real life habit."

SL/weird glitch leads to The King living on

2007-11-30T20:25:00.000-05:00

Due to some glitch, Johnthomas's legs were bowlegged and I was actually taller than he was.
"It's great to see the top of your head," I joked.
It was only a matter of time till we got to an area where JT could take advantage of some steps.
/
"You are higher than me now," I observed. "And imagine my happiness at seeing the underside of your nose again."
JT dismounted, then the real fun began.
Patric: uh oh... i recognize those clothes
Patric: omg
/
Patric: is that Big E?

/

/
Patric: I didn't realize Elvis was so tan...
/
johnthomas Jun: in the house!
/
Patric: are you elvis or don ho?
/
johnthomas Jun: depends on blood alcohol level
/
Patric: if i see a lei over your neck i still won't know if you are Elvis or Don Ho
/
johnthomas Jun: let me relog
Patric: why, do you need sideburns?
Johnthomas Jun: that too
/
Moments later, ~~Johnthomas~~ Elvis came back and I got a good (side) view of him.
/
Patric: you look great
Elvis: woo that feels better
Patric: if slightly chunky
Patric: you are the slightly chunky Elvis
Elvis: i love donuts

Then I knew the whole reason for the transformation: "You are no longer bowlegged!"
--
By shapeshifting into Elvis, Johnthomas had gotten rid of the bowleggedness. Plus, he gained a lot more confidence with women.
Then, between puffs, I thought of the 'Ultimate Elvis.' "Be the fat Elvis," I suggested, "but with a military crewcut."
But by then I saw that Johnthomas was already shedding bits of the Elvis body to return to his former Self. Everything was being replaced, save the legs. Elvis's legs he would keep.
Shoes were a different story.
"Do I really need shoes?" the half-n-half Elvis asked me. "What do you say?"
"No, you're tall enough already."
"Shoes, Patric," a nearby spectator scolded. "Mama didn't raise an ape."
"Can't we settle on sandals?" I asked.
"Why?" the spectator asked.
"I love seeing Second Life toes," I admitted. "Even on men. There were no such thing as Second Life toes until about 3 months ago...Someone finally invented them. The novelty hasn't worn off yet."
"Ick," the spectator said.
"Don't get me wrong--I'd rather see them on women, but until the novelty wears off I'll go ahead and check them out on men too."
"..."
"As a creator, especially. I'm always looking out for new ideas."
"Last time I checked I didn't have toes myself," the spectator admitted. "But that was over 8 months ago."
"Ahhh."
"They could have been invented and attached by now. Who knows."
"Right."

SL/Things on screen are becoming more "real"

2007-11-29T19:36:00.000-05:00

Hockey -- Second Life Hockey! -- was being broadcast on TV. It is amazing watching a simulcast of a sport that is all about speed...and Hockey speed being no problem in Second Life. We've come a long way in a short time!
/
My friend Uva Oxide, the walking-talking tree, showed up at the theater while the game was on.

Patric: down in front
Patric: you, the tree, down in front
Uva Oxide: yeah yeah :-P
Patric: this is supposed to be a live broadcast
Uva Oxide: man, I'm that person with the big hair
Patric: lol
Patric: you've finally become that person
Uva Oxide: I like to hide in the back if it's a big crowd ;-)
Patric: you need a trim
Patric: hold on, i got a chainsaw
Patric: j/k
Uva Oxide: yeah been adding branches actually
Patric: oh cool

Cum on Feel the Noize

2007-11-28T06:27:00.000-05:00

JohnThomas was doing a perfect gesture to the above song in tribute to Kevin DuBrow, the late lead singer of Quiet Riot.
He wanted me to join in with the hair.
/

"Come on, get some hair."
/

I didn't have any hair in Inventory.
/

"When they told me I was going bald, JT, I decided to let the hair on the sides grow to my knees."

Patrick: ...and so it remains
Patric: btw i use as much shampoo as you
/

johnthomas Jun: no way
Patric: my hair is 'transparent' right now, so you can't tell.

Jeniffer Shelford: HEY EVERYONE!
Patric: hi jennifer

johnthomas Jun: hello
Patric: i mean jeniffer
Jeniffer Shelford: It's ok!
Jeniffer Shelford: I get that all the time!
Patric: lol
Jeniffer Shelford: You need to fix your hair.

/
Patric: i am preoccupied with hair
Patric: i am so tired of hair
Sugar Enoch: LOL,,,, patric
Savannah Ducatillon: I am a hair whore
Kami Singh changes her hair for Patric
Kami Singh: I bet I own more hair than you Savannah :P
johnthomas Jun: battle of the....
bella Fiddlesticks: now now girls play nice before someone loses a weave!!!
Patric: forget all other hair...i'm going to be first one w/ fetish for armpit hair
/

bella Fiddlesticks: LMAO
/

Sugar Enoch: eeewwww Patric
Kami Singh: ROTFL Patric
Patric: it's my right
Sugar Enoch: yes it is
Patric: other hair is overexposed
Savannah Ducatillon: arm pit hair huh Patric?
Savannah Ducatillon: eww!
Patric: not saying it's official
Savannah Ducatillon: it should be outlawed
Patric: definitely
Patric: it makes no sense...unlike other hair (snickers)
/

johnthomas Jun: let's part the hair
johnthomas Jun: hehe
/

Patric: let's dye one one color
Patric: and the other another color
/

bella Fiddlesticks: SEXAY

SL/Major Glitch/thank god it was nearing 16:20

2007-11-26T20:02:00.000-05:00

The glitch that's been causing men to grow breasts finally caught up to me tonight, and it was my turn to walk around in what appeared to be C (possibly D) cups. I had to take off my shirt in order to view them properly.

Meanwhile, Ulises once again was "all male," so he messaged me.

[16:13] Ulises Snook: hi stoner. doing good?
[16:22] Patric Styrian: stonering as we speak
[16:22] Ulises Snook: i know man
[16:22] Ulises Snook: but good?
[16:22] Patric Styrian: i have breasts
[16:23] Patric Styrian: it finally affected me tonight
[16:23] Ulises Snook: how is it?
[16:23] Patric Styrian: it's a glitch that's been going around
[16:23] Patric Styrian: terrible
[16:23] Patric Styrian: i keep staring at them, but want to cover them up
[16:23] Ulises Snook: i want to see it
[teleports me to him]
[16:26] Ulises Snook: patric
[16:26] Ulises Snook: want a bra?
[16:27] Patrick Styrian: lol
[16:27] Patrick Styrian: no thanks
[16:27] Patrick Styrian: i don't own a bra in inventory, nor do i plan on starting

SL/New Suit

2007-11-26T18:16:00.001-05:00

I went to a store called "Nanobricks," where I bought a swimsuit that was only two or three nanometers in size. I wore it immediately to a nearby "swimwear required" beach where I got kicked out for not wearing a suit! Some people!

Then, I wore it to a "wintry wonderland" and--as advertised--got the chills, which makes me think I got extra extra value.

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area pt. 27/poor Bill

2007-11-25T15:12:00.000-05:00

Dannie the tiger was in front of Soy.

"Dannie, why your arms folded? what's wrong?"

(Dannie vanished.)

Soy: I'm sorry to have addressed her just as she teleported out of here

Mack: i'm sure she doesn't mind, soy

/
Soy: thank u, Mack
Soy: i see you are growing a beard, too
/

Soy: nice
Mack: i think it's maxed
Mack: lol
Mack: it never gets any thicker, or longer
Soy: i always wish to get thicker and longer...

Bill: sorry to interrupt but is there a problem tonight with clothes and things?

I'm pretty sure I'm not a girl

Soy: Um

/
(Bill had breasts... With capital Cs.)

/
Soy: do those things work?

Bill: it must be lag or something

Michel: where are Siegfried and Roy

Bill: is there some way I can reset my look?
Bill: This is not my avatar
Tele Porta: ? bill, what do you mean?
Soy: i think you look fine

Mack: you could try to go into edit>appearance
Mack: that sometimes fixes
Soy: don't regress to a male avatar
//
Bill: but I'm a guy and it appears to me that my avatar is a girl
Soy: it's ok
Mack: well that's common
Soy: we will hold it against you
Bill Dreamscape: :)

Bill Dreamscape: I am cut to the quick
Tele Porta: bill, did you port into here?
Bill Dreamscape: 'no
Tele Porta: teleport?
Bill Dreamscape: this is my home
Bill Dreamscape: so to speak
Bill Dreamscape: Do I look like a girl to you all?
StiX Harvey: yes bill
Matty Boomhauer: Bill, yes you do
Bill Dreamscape: maybe if I had an IE on the end of my name I could get away with it
Bill Dreamscape: LOL
StiX Harvey: can i have a squeeze bill?
Soy Burger: turn around, "bill"
Bill Dreamscape: I've never been a girl before
StiX Harvey: hehehe
Soy Burger: i didn't see the sillouette of a penis when you turned around
Soy Burger: i think that means it's too late
Bill Dreamscape: oh no, doomed to be a girl
Bill Dreamscape: LOL
Soy Burger: you have your first admirer, Bill
Bill Dreamscape: uh oh

Soy Burger: Bill, i think you are getting more noticed than if you were a guy
/

Soy Burger: ok, he is signalling his interest

Soy: he has removed his shirt
/

Bill Dreamscape: he he
Bill Dreamscape: I'm in trouble
lvl3memba Woller: lol
Soy Burger: both men and women signal their interest by removing their shirts
Kristiin Cortes: lol
Bill Dreamscape: lol

//
lvl3memba Woller: so not true!
lvl3memba Woller: lol
Soy Burger: we saw it with our own made up eyes

Bill got dressed all the way.

Soy Burger: thank you, bill, for getting dressed, finally, because, even though you're not (really) a woman, this is still a PG sim

SL/Sighting

2007-11-24T19:48:00.000-05:00

I saw Milo making out with Marycat on the beach near the house. There was lots of surf.

This is me standing on their hammock, attempting to surf.
Ulises was there too and I noticed he was not the same as when I saw him last.
"You changed your hair," I said. "And your heels. ...And your breasts."
"I'm bored," he stated.
Ulises had bigger boobs now to play with (if he wanted to...). Every avatar can, with a few minor clicks, undergo a major alteration. He could easily have transformed into a 350lb male motorcycle psychopath if he wanted to. But he chose a more delicate specimen.
As I was standing there, trying to figure him out, a blur caught my attention, and I looked up and darned if it wasn't Santa Claus! He was riding a reindeer about 75 mph. The reindeer was beaming a red light straight ahead.
"It's Santa!" I yelled, snapping pics.
"I don't believe in Santa," replied Ulises.
"I've got pics. Digital pics!"
I don't think Ulises cared. Anyway, I've got the first shot of Santa (possibly) in Second Life so far this year...and remember, this was the tropics.

SL/Turkey IM

2007-11-21T22:37:00.000-05:00

[19:13] Turkey: happy pre-thanksgiving
[19:14] Angelaa: Aww how is Mr. Turkey
[19:14] Angelaa: getting nervous?
[19:14] Turkey: no, calm
[19:14] Turkey: i've accepted my fate
[19:14] Angelaa: still a turkey?
[19:17] Turkey: for now
[19:17] Turkey: soon i will be digested
[19:18] Angelaa: gizzard and all
[19:18] Turkey: i hope they choke on my gizzard
[19:18] Angelaa: lol
[19:20] Angelaa: gobble?
[19:20] Turkey: you don't speak our language
[19:20] Turkey: stop pretending you do
[19:21] Angelaa: lol
[19:21] Angelaa: is it more like gobble gobble?
[19:21] Turkey: if you stutter, sure
[19:21] Turkey: or if you're really hungry

SL/Thanksgiving Eve

2007-11-21T21:22:00.000-05:00

I needed distractions so I went immediately to
Laguna Nude Beach.
/
Celeste Lopez: lol
Celeste Lopez: turkey
Sophia Kittel: shit
Celeste Lopez: yummy
Sophia Kittel: a turkey
Sophia Kittel: hahah
Celeste Lopez: i like white meat plz
Celeste Lopez: hehe
Sophia Kittel: hiya turkey
Turkey: i'm naked except for my hat
Sophia Kittel: are u juicy or dry?
Celeste Lopez: where's the stuffing
Celeste Lopez: hlol
Turkey: saliva starting already i see
Sophia Kittel: do u need to be stufffed?
Celeste Lopez: haha
Sophia Kittel: hehe
Celeste Lopez: loca
Sophia Kittel: hahah
Turkey: i need to relax
Celeste Lopez: give me a knife
Sophia Kittel: i wouldnt relax if i were u
Sophia Kittel: heh heh heh
Celeste Lopez: haha
Turkey: i came to a nude beach so i could relax and spot knives

Zombie Vinson: sorry did i miss anything
Celeste Lopez: we're about to cut the turkey
Zombie Vinson: ohhh yeah happy thanksgiving guys :):)
Celeste Lopez: aww
Celeste Lopez: ty
Celeste Lopez: same to u
Zombie Vinson: i'm in aust...we don't have it here :(

---

Later...

Turkey: mmmm

Turkey: nice thighs

Turkey: juicy breasts

Zombie Vinson: lmfao

Turkey: i'm talking about myself

Celeste Lopez: haha

Still later....

Turkey: this is a nude beach and all i've seen so far nude are guys
Crystalicious Oh: Well, some people dont wanna be nude lol
Turkey: as a turkey i find that perposterous
Crystalicious Oh: Well this is a very nice place
Turkey: i mean preposterous
Turkey: i checked with Google to see if i spelled perposterous right
Turkey: turns out, 10,000 people spelled it wrong too

SL/Countdown

2007-11-20T21:38:00.000-05:00

Angela hadn't seen me in awhile.

"Are you still a turkey?" she asked.

"Yep. On the run."

Angelaa Capalini: for 2 more days?

Patric Styrian: yeah, need to get lean

Patric Styrian: got 2 days

Patric Styrian: i want to shed 16 ounces

I thought about becoming a fish...

"No one eats fish as far as I know on Thanksgiving," I said.

"...although it would have made sense."

SL/Fact and some fiction

2007-11-16T20:26:00.000-05:00

I wandered onto her land.

"Want to eat?" she asked me.

Did I look like I needed to eat? I may live longer.

"It's better to be a bird. Believe me," she said.

Did I hear her right?

"Do you speak?" she finally asked.

It was my turn to talk.

"I speak chicken scratch and turkish," I said.

She had no hair on her head, so I wondered if this signified at attempt to "drop out" of society...thus, her appraisal of birds.

"You know, you can be one yourself," I said.

"???"

"A bird. You can be a bald eagle. You can be a turkey vulture too."

"???"

"I thought you liked birds..."

"I do like birds. I have one in my house, and one in my skillet right now."

"Ewwwwwww."

"I eat in front of my parakeet; he doesn't mind."

Traitor, I thought.

"The last chicken I ate had no name. I named my parakeet, though. His name is Spot."

"Even thawed birds deserve names," I reminded her.

"Spot is named after my last pet, a dog." She wasn't really listening.

"Wild," I thought.

"Spot ran away shortly after I got my parakeet. So I just started calling my parakeet Spot."

"Uhhhhh" I said.

----

...to be continued

SL/that's what SL pills are for

2007-11-15T06:55:00.001-05:00

"I've gone from average height to one of the tallest instantly."

No bounderies

2007-11-12T21:25:00.000-05:00

Often I feel we are in a dream world, even though we are told we definitely aren't, and our imaginations fuel other dream worlds, such as Second Life. Second Life is the millionth in a line of succeeding dream worlds, if you believe that imagination follows imagination. For instance, I imagine my character in Second Life imagining his own character (something like a Second Life within a Second Life), just as in real life, going the other direction, I can imagine myself being imagined.
If you think about it...
'Life is imaginary' is just as good of an explanation as 'life is real.'

SL/Escape-ism

2007-11-11T21:22:00.000-05:00

More and more events, I'm noticing are becoming 'Thanksgiving'-themed the closer we get to the magical date of 22 November. I have mixed feelings about that date, because although I get to see plenty of Turkeys leading up to it, such as this stately fellow, the fact remains we will be eventually be eaten, no matter what.
/
Last year, I'm told, most of the turkeys in Second Life got together and tried to escape, symbolically. It's interesting that they were reportedly successful.
For the next week (or so) I'm going to try to find the ringleader of last year's turkey rebellion in case it should happen again. He goes by the name "Pole Tree" I'm told, which is an allusion to "Poultry." "Pole Tree" is said to be such a brilliant escape artist he can literally wait until he's being passed around the table before making his getaway. He launches right off the dinner table, in front of the surprised guests and horrified hostess, turns around and faces them with a big ol' smile on his face--not accusingly--and says: "Happy Thanksgiving," before diving out the window.
He then meets up with all his cohorts near the swamp, and they all press the little red X together, and that's that.

SL/Treed

2007-11-10T21:47:00.001-05:00

Speaking of trees...
I followed my good friend Uva Oxide (a tree) into a pop art exhibit where soup cans grabbed hold of us.
They carried us up to the ceiling and told us we were lovers/haters of pop art, before releasing us.
Here is Uva shrugging afterwards.
Here is a full moon seen through one of the windows.

I asked Uva if the moon had any influence over his growth, or was it all sun.
He didn't respond because he'd vanished.

There was no sign of his stump, either, so he was really missing.

SL/Tree house

2007-11-10T20:53:00.001-05:00

I'm a turkey again, after foiling the 'freak' in me. Elle helped me become a turkey again, because, as a freak in her club I felt terribly out of place. At least as a turkey people have a reason to smile at me.

This is my neighbor lady's place, who seems to have exchanged her Space Needle apartment for what looks like a treehouse overlooking the pool.

As a turkey, I feel I have a right to stay in her tree house.

SL/Freaky

2007-11-08T21:29:00.000-05:00

I couldn't rez as my usual avatar, nor could I rez as my back-up avatar (see below), so I ended up being a combination of both: a turkey/elephant (but with a rat's tail) and some human characteristics. (Thank you SL for making me a FREAK.)
I met two women doctors who offered to give me a (non-) free check up.

This is me sitting on the edge of their bed--a freak.

"Examine me please," I pleaded, "and please tell me that I'm a healthy freak."

Freak: ...and again, sorry about the tail
Dr. Natalie Laughton: Is that grey clothes? or are you nude
Dr. Natalie Laughton: Because we are doing a body examination, correct?
Freak: i think it's my skin
Dr. Natalie Laughton: Oh
Dr. Natalie Laughton: Is that your only skin?
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Okay..So What Color Would you Expect your Skin Color To Be?
Freak: blushing red
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Considerate Done!
Dr. Natalie Laughton: Alright.. please tell me what you would like. Body examination, correct sir?
Freak: yes, i need to find out among other things if i am in possession of a penis
Dr. Natalie Laughton: Alright..
Freak: and nipples
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Okay.
Freak: and if i can be tattooed or not
Dr. Natalie Laughton: We can do a penis transplant
Freak: can i pick which celebrity penis i want?
Dr. Natalie Laughton: sure
Freak: i want the Lou Ferigno
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Okay..
Dr. Natalie Laughton: alright
Dr. Natalie Laughton: now this is going to cost for the surgery, and the penis
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Thank you..That's All The Information We Need.
Freak: it will cost me my virginity that's for certain
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Sir..Can we Please Explain To you?
Freak: without a penis i've led a carefree life
Dr. Natalie Laughton: okay sir i think we know enough about your personal life
Dr. Natalie Laughton: now about the transplant
Dr. Evonna Emmons: We Buy The Stuff..And We Help you..So..Yes you would habe to..
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Have*
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Excuse My Language.
Freak: Would you like a man if you knew deep down he didn't have a penis?
Dr. Natalie Laughton: ok so
Dr. Natalie Laughton: doctor emmons
Dr. Natalie Laughton: how much will the surgery cost?
Freak: this surgery will cost an arm and a leg
Dr. Natalie Laughton: please sir
Dr. Evonna Emmons: The Surgery Will be About..i say 20 Lindens..Because..Its Changed you Very Differently.
Dr. Natalie Laughton: and the penis will be 10
Dr. Natalie Laughton: we are very inexpensive here
Dr. Natalie Laughton: ok now the penis
Freak: a 10 dollar penis...
Dr. Natalie Laughton: well
Dr. Natalie Laughton: how much do you have
Dr. Natalie Laughton: ?
Freak: my whole lifetime dreaming of one, and you offer a 10 dollar penis
Dr. Natalie Laughton: its nice..
Freak: can i see it?
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Well In Real Life?you have to Pay For Surgery..So we do It Here.
Dr. Natalie Laughton: lol
Freak: i promise i wont touch it
Dr. Evonna Emmons: lol.
Dr. Natalie Laughton: uhm
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Are you going to Buy it?
Dr. Natalie Laughton: ill attach it to my arm so u can see it
Freak: you expect me to make life altering decisions in a hurry don't you?
Dr. Natalie Laughton: ok
Dr. Natalie Laughton: so when i click it

Dr. Natalie Laughton: it can go regular, and erect
Freak: see me shaking?

Dr. Natalie Laughton: yup
Freak: that means i am thrilled
Dr. Natalie Laughton: okay so want the surgery?
Freak: yes, i think so
Freak: who is going to perform it?
Dr. Natalie Laughton: both
Dr. Natalie Laughton: of us
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Please...Pay The Amount...First.
Freak: Are you both going to be sterile? Or is it my job to be sterile?
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Sir..First Before we start The Surgery Can you Please Pay it?
Dr. Evonna Emmons: The Amount...For The Surgery
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Thank you
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Natalie
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Please Give him The Penis.
Dr. Evonna Emmons: He's Paid.
Dr. Natalie Laughton: Ok
Dr. Natalie Laughton: Lets do the surgery
Freak: don't hand it to me
Freak: fit it on me
Dr. Evonna Emmons: You have to Have It Sir.
Freak: but i want you to have it
Freak: for awhile
Dr. Natalie Laughton: Ok. Ill tell you what
Dr. Natalie Laughton: ill give it to u, then ill act like i am putting it on after u put it on
Dr. Natalie Laughton: will that make you happy?
Dr. Evonna Emmons: lol.
Freak: no
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Then What Will?
Dr. Natalie Laughton: Well there is no other way
Dr. Natalie Laughton: What do you want
Freak: i want you to give me a penis AND one of your lips
Dr. Natalie Laughton: Uh
Dr. Natalie Laughton: We are not permitted to do that
Dr. Natalie Laughton: sir
Freak: you can make copies
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Woah..You Wen't To Far Sir.
Freak: oh, and i don't know which lip
Freak: if i had to choose one...
Freak: i'd say tongue
Freak: forget about lip i want tongue instead
Dr. Evonna Emmons: If you aren't going to Do This Right..Can you Please Just Say So..We aren't Allowed..To Do This..To Any Client Sir..We Are Here To Do our Job..Right.
Freak: wow, that was a lot of capitalization, i appreciate that
Dr. Evonna Emmons: What Color Skin Again Sir?
Freak: um, flesh colored
Freak: turkey colored flesh
Dr. Natalie Laughton gave you Scripted Penis by SH Hospital.
Freak: thank you, i can feel it already
Freak: it's still in my Inventory and wanting to get out
IM: Natalie Laughton: Please attach the penis
Dr. Natalie Laughton: Okay. Search Scripted Penis
Dr. Natalie Laughton: and it should come up [so I attach it]
Dr. Natalie Laughton: woops
Freak: it came up under my arm
Dr. Natalie Laughton: let me try this again

Freak: that looks like a mini turkey
Dr. Natalie Laughton: detach it
Dr. Natalie Laughton: and ill give you a new one
Dr. Evonna Emmons Gently Puts Skin Cream On your Skin..
Dr. Evonna Emmons: You Should Turn Color's In 5 Minutes Sir.
Dr. Natalie Laughton gave you New Scripted Penis by SH Hos.
Freak: lol
Freak: what a job
Freak: ok, thank you
Dr. Natalie Laughton: wait
Dr. Natalie Laughton: were not done
Dr. Natalie Laughton: !
Freak: oooh
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Natalie Still Has to Fix Your Skin..
Dr. Natalie Laughton gently applys cream onto Patric's penis area.
Freak: that tingles
Dr. Natalie Laughton puts cream on Patric's penis.
Freak: ice cream
Dr. Natalie Laughton waits a few minutes for the cream to dry.
Natalie Laughton puts lotion everywhere the cream was.
Freak: thanks for not missing a spot
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Anytime.
Dr. Natalie Laughton applys lotion on the penis.
Freak: from now on my penis asks that it be called by its more technical name, cock
Dr. Natalie Laughton: uh ok
Freak: Wait, i forgot to properly name it
Freak: do you want to hold the naming ceremony now?
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Sir..We Aren
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Here For This..Can you Please Let is Finish?
Dr. Natalie Laughton: alright do you need anymore cream or lotion?
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Us*
Dr. Natalie Laughton: we need the penis to be erect in order for the surgery to be finished
Freak: ok, which button?

Freak: is there a mole i should be looking for?
Dr. Natalie Laughton: no
Dr. Evonna Emmons: No.Sor.
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Sir*
Dr. Natalie Laughton: im asking
Dr. Natalie Laughton: are you 'hard'

Freak: i am hard of hearing and hard after hearing
Dr. Natalie Laughton: kk its erect:

Freak: yes, you made it hard
Freak: thank you
Freak: just by talking about it
Freak: the slightest bit of attention, it does its thing
Dr. Natalie Laughton: alright... we need to finish attaching your 'cock'

Freak: be sensitive, i'm poultry most of the time
Dr. Evonna Emmons: Okay..Sir.Can you Please Not Intterupt Natalie?She's Trying..To Do her Job..Can you not Leave Any Of your Comments Here Please.

Dr. Natalie Laughton: Thank you ev
Evonna Emmons: I'll Run Down..The Hall..To Get Some..Tools..For This Surgery. [she leaves, Dr. Laughton stays]
Freak: sorry for commenting during your sentence breaks

Freak thinks What's taking her so long?
[from down the hall] Dr. Evonna Emmons: Dr. Laughton-The Receptionist Needs To Talk to you In a Second..Please Finsh What your Are Doing Ma'am
Dr.Natalie Laughton puts a special numbing cream on his balls.
Dr.Natalie Laughton: Ok ill be rite back
Freak: hey wait a sec....
Dr.Natalie Laughton: hm?
Freak: that's the oldest trick in the book, getting called away
Freak: meanwhile i'm sitting here with numbing agent
Dr.Natalie Laughton: sir, ill be right back
Dr.Natalie Laughton: be good please..and we will be good to you
Freak: i'll be good and try not to open any drawers

SL/SL Made Me a Freak

2007-11-08T19:37:00.000-05:00

I logged in as an incomplete turkey, which made me not too happy, so I switched to an emergency elephant back-up, which didn't rez properly, either, so this is what I turned into--a freak. The buck teeth and hat are from another avatar that I tried to switch to and failed--a hobo.
I logged out, cleared my cache, restarted my computer, and the problem persisted: I'm a freak.
Problem is, there are still places to go and people to see. Am I going as a freak?
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I guess so...
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Hallelujah, I'ma freak!

SL/Missing Milo leads to The Vagina Dialog

2007-11-07T19:49:00.000-05:00

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I met with Ulises, the Spaniard, who asked if I'd seen Milo, our Serbian buddy, and I had to say "no" (at least not lately). And the word "no" he understood right away, since it was a Spanish word too. He doubly understood me.

"We need to look in Lost and Found," I suggested. (Does Second Life have one?)

"I've looked there already. Nothing," he said.

I told Ulises I had to use the sandbox. "Brb," I told him.

After a minute or so I returned and asked him why he hadn't kept typing while I was away since I use cordless headphones. He didn't understand, so I explained it was okay to keep typing while I was away in real life, since I can hear the typing noises anywhere I go, and I completely understand "typing."

"I can hear every word you're spelling out" I told him.

"Sure..." said Ulises.

Ulises wanted to leave and go somewhere else. Fine, I told him. When he asked what on earth was taking me so long, I told him I was waiting for a leash.

Ulises Snook: Leash?
Patric: I don't go anywhere unless I'm leashed.
Patric: sorry, policy.

"I am not gay," I reminded him after a few moments, "yet get a leash."

We decided to stay.

Ulises at first thought I was Serbian, not a Floridian, because of the "Milo connection." We got to talking about languages and he said he had taken French in high school but needed to brush up on it again. I suggested that Second Life was the perfect place to re-learn it rather than travelling up north. He said most French people speak English in SL.
I said that's only because he hadn't bumped into any yet. "That way you'll at least get reacquainted with the curse words."
He said I sounded American, not Serbian. (I kinda liked the idea I was mistaken for a Serbian.)

"We are all one people," I said.

I said Americans used to be one color: white, with a wee bit of pink. Now we are slowly becoming brown.

"Like a turkey" I said.

Ulises said he had to return to the States soon. To Madison, especially.

"No one's in Madison right now," he said.

"What's her last name?" I asked.

"Madison is a town. lol. WI."

"We don't speak of WI very much for some reason."

"Why not?"

"It is like a secret place. Away from the hubbub."

"Hubbub?"

"Hubbub is like daily fracas. Except 'fracas' has nothing to do with 'France,' except I think they invented it."

He said Madison, WI is a college town with lots of pretty girls, and plenty to drink. I asked how many of them were stoners. He said he didn't think many of them were stoners.

"Too bad," I said. "I'd rather hang out with the stoners than the drinkers."

It was creeping up on 4:20...

[16:10] Patric: i divide the world into two parts
[16:10] Patric: the alcohol users and the rest of us
[16:10] Ulises Snook: i like the beer a lot
[16:10] Ulises Snook: i started late
[16:10] Ulises Snook: 5 years ago or so
[16:10] Ulises Snook: i just drink beer, mostly
[16:11] Patric: do you like it so much you now use it for cooking?
[16:11] Ulises Snook: i don't like the other alcohol drinks
[16:11] Ulises Snook: i just cook chicken with beer
[16:11] Ulises Snook: pollo a la cerveza
[16:11] Patric: if i gave you a beer spiked with wine, would you drink it?
[16:11] Ulises Snook: a mixture?
[16:11] Patric: yes
[16:11] Ulises Snook: no
[16:11] Patric: ok
[16:11] Patric: a true alchy would
[16:11] Ulises Snook: you?
[16:12] Patric: no
[16:12] Ulises Snook: i am not alchy
[16:12] Ulises Snook: i just like beer
[16:12] Patric: i see
[16:12] Ulises Snook: and get drunk with it
[16:12] Patric: beer has made me get to know my bladder more
[16:12] Patric: before, i barely knew it
[16:12] Ulises Snook: bladder?
[16:12] Patric: bladder is the organ which holds urine
[16:13] Ulises Snook: vejiga, i got it
[16:13] Patric: not vejina
[16:13] Patric: bladder
[16:13] Ulises Snook: no
[16:13] Ulises Snook: vagina is other thing
[16:13] Patric: lol
[16:13] Patric: barely
[16:13] Ulises Snook: lol
[16:13] Patric: how do you say vagina?
[16:13] Ulises Snook: same
[16:13] Patric: is it a common spanish word?
[16:14] Ulises Snook: but the g sounds different
[16:14] Ulises Snook: no,
[16:14] Ulises Snook: we say coño
[16:14] Ulises Snook: coño=pussy
[16:14] Patric: we say pussy too
[16:15] Patric: there must be a country where vagina isn't a word and we could move there and name our daughter by that name and encounter no problems
[16:15] Patric: brb
[16:15] Ulises Snook: i think vagina is very common in many languages

SL/Good Night pt. 3

2007-11-06T20:02:00.000-05:00

Tonight marks the third night I've shown up at this place, and here he is again. This time he's wearing a suit. Meanwhile, his seatmate's beard has grown out a little.

If my calculations are correct, they've earned about $50L, just by sitting there, and eventually they'll go somewhere else where they can earn money standing up.

I once was at a dance hall where you got paid to dance, and the longer you danced, the more money you got. If you went on a break, however, or stopped dancing for whatever reason, you lost all your earnings. You literally had to keep dancing non-stop for 10 hours before they paid you. One couple I saw was into their seventh or eighth hour dancing, and you could tell they were tired. He kept calling her by different names. She stopped using her space bar altogether so her words cametogetherlikethis. I don't know if they finished or not because I was forced to drop out after the first hour because a bot asked me a surprise question while I was away visiting the fridge, and because I didn't answer, I got disqualified by the bot, who assumed I was using a script to stay "alive" in Second Life while sneaking away in real life. Does that make sense? I appealed to the owners of the club to see if I could get my hour back, and they said "no," that I would have to start all over again, and to answer any questions the bot should ask me.

Someone asked me what was the question was, and I said I had no idea. The bot just told me I was "busted" for not answering its question.

When I inquired what the question was, the bot just looked at me.

To me, it seems like bots don't like answering questions themselves.

SL/Good Night pt. 2

2007-11-05T21:25:00.000-05:00

Good Night part 2, stoner style (see below for part 1)

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I rezzed to the very last place I left (both seats now occupied).

"hello again, Johnni"
"hey"
"shirtless, enjoying afternoon sun?"
"way too hot"
"who is the dude? next to you? ...wait...i don't know how to refer to him"

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Johnnie: i dont know either
Patric: i mean to her
Patric: i mean to him
[18:03] Patric: i mean to her
[18:03] You: this makes me anxious
[18:03] Johnni: never realy looked at it him/her
[18:04] You: you are more interested in making money than looking?
[18:04] You decline The Hummingbird Cafe, Menorca (58, 11, 23) from A group member named Leira Vaughan.
[18:04] Leo Ra [Johnni's real name]: yeah, i'm in im's
[18:04] Leo Ra: i not too long ago came from some club
[18:04] You: it reminds me of the sandwich--club, i don't like it
[18:04] Leo Ra: he has ok looking boobs but i aint tuchen em
[18:05] Patric: please don't call them boobs
[18:05] Patric: please call them breasts
[18:05] Leo Ra: dont know what to call em
[18:05] Turkey: well, we turkeys call them breasts
[18:05] Leo Ra: how about he-she boobs
[18:06] Turkey: it's a unique look
[18:06] Leo Ra: ha yeah
[18:07] Turkey: i think it may have to do with the sun going down
[18:07] Leo Ra: like a druid ha
[18:08] Patric: i stop talking now. i want to watch you guys earning money
[18:10] Patric: that's what i do for fun

SL/Good Night

2007-11-03T23:30:00.001-04:00

In Doll City, which Elle co-founded, there is a camping bench, where a camper can earn $L just by sitting.

Johnni had earned $18L by the time I arrived. I figured he'd been sitting close to an hour.

"Keep it up," I told him. "There's a bonus in it for you."

"Bonus?" Johnni asked.

"Tonight, when the clocks go back an hour, you get an extra hour's payout. Congratulations."

He was stunned. He hadn't thought about the time change, nor had be planned on sitting that long. It was merely 8 o'clock.

"What if I don't want to participate?" he asked.

Was he from another part of the world?

"You must participate, man. You're in too deep already."

"No thanks," he said, standing.

I took over his spot. I wanted to sit on a warm seat, anyway, in preparation for the holiday.

"Not bad," I told him. "I would rate this 175 degrees."

"I'm glad you like it." His body language told me it was time for me to leave.

"I'll leave just as soon as you stop sitting on me" I said.

"What?" his muffled voice said back.

"GET OFFA ME" I shouted.

He had (inadvertantly) sat on me, trying to reclaim the old magic on that side of the bench, I guess, but unfortunately I was still there. He apologized profusely.

"No, I apologize," I interrupted. "I can't tolerate anyone being profuse."

The bench was apparently not big enough for the both of us. So I hopped off.

"I'll be back for any feathers that I may have dropped" I said.

"I'll be sure to save them for you," he replied.

"Good," I said. "And any hairs I stumble across, I'll save them for you too."

"Groovy." He smiled.

"Gracias," I said.

"Gravy" he replied.

"Gross," I whispered.

"Goodnight," he said.

"Good night, indeed, with your bonus and all."

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area pt. 26/the meaning of lol

2007-11-01T19:55:00.000-04:00

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Castor Breguet: Excuseme if I do an stupid question, but, What means "lol"??

Laurana Lilliehook: lol = laughing out loud
Blane Raymaker: ROTFL
Soy Burger: lol is a trick you do with your tongue
Blane Raymaker: ROTFLMAO

Soy Burger: there is almost too much laughter in Second Life

Soy Burger: it is being blamed by some for lag
Blane Raymaker: lol
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Fog decided to play dead/furry infestation/warning: cross-talk

Soy Burger: lol Fog
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Fog Tenk: im a corpse
Soy Burger: you are lying low
Soy Burger: nice to meet u, corpse
Soy Burger: a day late aren't we?
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Fog Tenk: give my body to science
Soy Burger: climatology
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Scottish Alcott: fog, dont be upset if they give it right back again matey, lol
Soy Burger: we must first give you a proper burial before we donate you to science
Laurana Lilliehook: lol
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Fog Tenk: i have good parts
Laurana Lilliehook: damn, suddenly I am surrounded by furries
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moog Petrova: yep nice socks foggy
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Soy Burger: no allergies i hope
MANDALANDA Allen: lol
Yobby Slade: it's time for furry infestation
MANDALANDA Allen: Hoooo!
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fist Beaumont howls! "AROOOOOOOoooooooo!"
Soy Burger: furries are here to make sure no one is wearing fur
Laurana Lilliehook: lol
Manny Hamaski: thats so last year
Soy Burger: that is felt on Fog's shirt, not fur
Soy Burger: 'think felt not pelt'
MANDALANDA Allen: Lau, what did you do to Fog?
Fog Tenk: someone should say a few words
Laurana Lilliehook: I did nothing to Fog!!!
MANDALANDA Allen: hehehehe
Soy Burger: Fog was telling us some very lame jokes, finally he just 'died'
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MANDALANDA Allen: poor fog
Soy Burger: he died on stage
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Fog Tenk: we all got to go
Soy Burger: he might be invited back
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Soy Burger: test his reflexes to see if he's alive
Soy Burger: make the horse go to bathroom over him
Soy Burger: see if he reacts
MANDALANDA Allen: doh
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Fog Tenk: i told the devil i was married twice he wants me to give tours in hell
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Soy Burger: Fog has got a pulse
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Soy Burger: he may be the only one around us who does

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Soy Burger: it keeps showing i'm typing although i'm not
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Soy Burger: although, i am
Soy Burger: right now

Seren Qinan: omg!! lag
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Soy Burger: fog is coming to life!
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Soy Burger: i just saw him hump the air
Seren Qinan: i blame csi lol
Soy Burger: put a chalk line around him
Soy Burger: then i get in spot and see if my body is bigger or not
Scottish Alcott: big story on the news tonight as well
moog Petrova: its life jim but not as we know it
[out of Fog's right hand he then released some kind of balls or bubbles that looked like smoke signals]
Soy Burger: Fog is sending out distress signals
Soy Burger: he is calling for Indian doctor
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Seren Qinan: what was on the news scottish?
Soy Burger: i'm not interested in watching the news, unless it is in Scottish
Seren Qinan: lol soy
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[Fog flipped over, and flipped back real quickly]
Soy Burger: Fog just did a nice flip
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Soy Burger: i think he is faking it
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moog Petrova: hahha soy
Soy Burger: that flip was too perfect
MANDALANDA Allen: lol
Soy Burger: tickle him someone
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[someone then whistled]
Soy Burger: when you whistled i saw his ears go up
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-/-True story--
As I was typing the above, I was using headphones, and Second Life was minimized, with the Welcome Area sounds in my ears.
Along came this weird humming noise, which started really low and got louder and louder until I couldn't stand it any longer. I whipped off my headphones to see if it was coming from the outside; nope, it was coming from the inside.
I maximized Second Life and saw these words:

[17:18] Glad Gaffer: either the lord is coming or a UFO

SL/amen.

2007-11-01T19:33:00.000-04:00

Manny: pardon my English
Soy: pardon my english, i speak with punctuation.
Adherent: ok
Soy: i don't believe in capitalization, but i strongly believe in punctuation.

SL/Consequences of Voice pt. 7

2007-10-31T20:52:00.000-04:00

Halloween

"Tonight I will be on mic so you can hear my new doorbell ringing."

"I will try not to sound two pounds heavier by tomorrow, but don't be surprised if I am."

"Tomorrow is NOT a day off work so if you hear me scream tonight, that's because of frustration--not because I'm scared."

Overheard

"Tonight is 'All Saints Day-Eve' so we can prepare for tomorrow where we will find out via Wikipedia who is the saint responsible for curing our acne."

SL/Encounters in Welcome Area pt. 25/Where on the planet are you, time-wise?

2007-10-31T20:40:00.000-04:00

(Florida to London)

Soy: I'm north of Thursday right now.

Soy: You say you are already in Thursday?